Friday Gossip & Music.

This weeks Gossip,

Jug ears has somehow spawned himself and his team into yet another final of a minor tournament. How he did it was to basically set his team up to bore the opposition into submission. That’s not far removed from his ever so fooking boring interviews. To be fair though I do get a good night’s sleep out of listening to that wanker, usually almost as soon as he opens his gob. On the downside I do wake up on the couch with the TV and friggin light on.

Valarie Putrid has once again threatened the west, on this occasion the UK with retribution since the PM gave Ukraine permission to bomb the absolute fook out of Russia with the gifted Storm Shadow missiles. Putrid is really annoyed his turkey shooting days are drawing to a close. Fook off Putrid, ya limp dicked bastard.

The BlueShite owner will walk away with £25 million if this new takeover goes through. He’s alleged to be completely shocked by such a figure, stating he expected something like £2.50. It’s your lucky day, ya wally.

Harry ( I’m as thick as the granny fiddler ) Claim has questioned the 99.999999999999999% of opinion in regards to the brutal assault in the penalty area the other night. He said, ” Of course it’s a penalty, I hardly touched him but I did hurt my lil toe when I kicked him. Clear and obvious foul” he mumbled. What a wanker.

In other gossip ,

Jock has been busy surfing the internet searching for Spanish flags. His aim is to firstly plant red and yellow flags all over Dundee and then the whole of Scotishland. He does have help though coz it is a big ask to accomplish that on ya own. Thankfully Jock’s localised request for assistance went viral and 99.9999999999% of Scotlander’s said they’ll plant red and yellow flags all over Scotishland ( with the exclusion of higher parts of the Highlands, for obviously obvious reasons). Up the Spanish, the Scotlander’s chant.🇪🇸.

To be honest, a large part of Liverpool will be doing the same, excluding the steep hills around Great Homer Street. Ya can get nose bleeds being that high up.

Up the English , said the French, but that’s not actually football related and a history lesson for another day.

Share your gossip here, I’m sure you’ve all got shit loads of the stuff stored in a closet somewhere but if not then post some music instead.

Hit it!