Almost time to play.

I’m not one to ramble, as you all know……but……

You might have noticed footy hasn’t been played for well over a week now, it’s confusing and irratating to say the least but there has been quite a bit of news to view whilst we wait for the resumption of the season.

SkipRats follow Barcelona’s model very closely, believing they know exactly what they are doing. They have recently joined the Catalan minnows in the billion £ club. The Glazers thought if Barfa can be a million quid in debt then so can the SkipRats. It was easy to achieve, said a spokeswoman ( no sexism here ) all they had to do was buy a pile of shite and call them first team players. Harry ‘ Donkey ‘ Maguire is their prize asset. Chavs are researching this model closely but stress it might take some time to spend all the billions they have in offshore bank accounts. Give them credit though for spending over a billion quid on utter shite. They promise to carry on spending on utter shite until UEFA hit them with a £100 fine for breaching FFP rules. Chavs will pay the fine off in installments coz they’re skint, apparently.

The BlueShite have threatened to take Liverpool FC to court, invoking the lifelong case of it’s not fair the reds are better than those tossers. They have stated they are older and therefore should have more trophies and should still be playing at the home of football. Well, if they’d paid the rent they might still be there and the Mighties might not even exist. One thing ( the only thing ) to thank the BlueShite for, gobshites.

John ( I’m a narcissistic imbecile ) has started up his own business. He’ll be charging people £100 for a picture with him and £500 a pop to eat with him. He’s not very well in the nut, but then again he has never been right in the head. He was apparently carted away by men in white coats after he dressed himself in a Chavs kit some years ago to invade celebrations of their fluke champions league win. What a plonker.

Anyfookingway we’re back on the road on Saturday early afternoon against the misfiring Wolves. Should be a doddle that one 😁. They’re shite. Not as shite as the BlueShite but shite all the same.

Early kickoffs are a worry, especially after two weeks of the players playing tiddlywinks on their enforced break from footy. It doesn’t usually bode well, but I’ll be working so I won’t have to suffer the pain…I mean excitement of a massive away win.

In this week’s gossip columns,

David ( I really should eat more ) Moyes has openly stated they’re on course to win the league. He’s a bit of a prick, as we know.

Rubber lips has confessed he’s terrified of injury. He said he’s scared to head a ball incase he miss times it and one or both of his lips split, he said the mess would be immense and the match might have to be abandoned whilst the authorities clear the pitch of several tonnes of rubber and plastic. It would definitely take some time to clear that up.

Jordon ( I’m a wanker ) Henderson stated last week,” We should have signed Bellingham”…….we? Where does he think he is, Liverpool? Move in hypocrite n keep ya gob shut ya noob. Noone cares what you think lad.

Jadon Sancho has removed his post about him being a scapegoat in the hope of licking some boots ( I’d say licking arse but this is a fooking family site after all ) to save his SkipRats career. Bit late now lad after 10 billion read your snivalling lil rant.

The CEO of the BlueShite expects the new stadium to be completed in time to host football in the newest, shiniest stadium in the Championship in front of record spectators approaching 10,000. He is worried it might not be ready in time, fearing they’ll be hosting footy in their new shiny stadium in league one. One can only hope Mr. CEO.

What will the season bring?

How the fook do I know? That’s what makes us all bite our fingernails down to the armpit.

Its gonna be one hell of a ride.

……We are LIVERPOOL and Fook the Rest!