Cutting the cud. (A ramble really)
In the news this week,
TractorMike came back from his hols on the Ilse of White n he didn’t bring us any gifts…what a bitch, well that’s what next doors 🐈 said.
Conor still sends any fooker he has WhatsApp contact with some proper odd stuff…. Keep ’em coming Conor, though some I couldn’t possibly post on a family site such as 4KK, for obviously obvious reasons……Yep Stu would become very, very…..and I proper mean very bemused. Jock would laugh his jockstrap off…not a pretty site according to Alice the Alpaca.
Shall I be serious for a moment? Next doors 🐈 is shaking her head, next door but ones 🐕 is nodding. I fooking dislike nodding friggin dogs.
Anyway, I was saying?????🤔
The news this week has been a trying affair to say the least n not just because Mike returned with no gifts for the chaps and chapette. No this was a serious issue…..footy was cancelled. Footy…… Cancelled…….?
There must have been a good reason to cancel da friggin footy, right?
I did promise ( no I fooking didn’t ) to be serious for a moment.
On Thursday the Queen of the UK & Northern Ireland passed away. As you might already know, I’m no royalist but that lady adored her country, even before her father became King, which wasn’t supposed to happen.
As a wee child growing up she was full of the beans of life, her uncle was King, her father just a Prince.
Life changed dramatically for her. A life she didn’t expect, but perhaps it was already written in the stars.
I’m not sure where the monarchy will go now, probably down the pan but one thing I will say as a non Royalist is I had the utmost respect for her as a person. By all accounts she had a wicked sense of humour.
We now have a King in place, he’s a bit of a gobshite and people call him out for adultery but remember one thing here. He was in love with Camilla long before he met Diana. It was just the fact he was not allowed to marry her for oddly odd reasons. That can’t have been easy.
Diana messed about with men so it works both ways.
Andy didn’t sweat through any of this, not even when Fergie ( no not whiskey nose…ya weirdos) was getting her toes sucked.
Anyway, that’s enough of the silly stuff…Let’s get serious here.
It appears the 4KK footy team is having a dip in form. I won’t single out players in public because those sort of things should be kept behind closed doors…usually in the 4KK public house, therefore I won’t mention Ata is having a shite start of it…Conor? Well he’s been pish too n before Jerry has a chuckle you’ve been shite too. As for the rest? Utter codswallop 🤭.
These very important matters will be addressed at the training ground as soon as Mickey Mouser brings the single malt whisky… Soop will drive to Blackpool to pick him up…..again, obviously.
In other news this week,
Daisy the Herefordshire cow 🐮 trashed the barn whilst TractorMike was on holiday. She invited a couple of bulls around for drinks and sandwiches. They both sort her affections and had a fight. Daisy fooked off down the pub n left ’em to it.
It wasn’t a pretty site when TractorMike got home.
But anyway.
The weekend off ( not for me, what’s a flipping weekend off???) probably did the lads some good. They can regroup and go again tomorrow.
Many fake Fairweather gobshites…I mean fans…..nope I definitely meant gobshites have already written us off. Gobshites.
Zia has gone missing in action again….word on the street is he’s shaving the hair on his back…now, I’ve no idea what that entails coz I don’t have hair on my back to shave. Apparently it can take up to a year to fully get rid of that shite… apparently.
Anyway, I’ll wind this down now and yes….I know…..it’s unlike me to ramble.
Last word on this 4KK weekly news feed.
Get in Ukraine. You’re kicking the shite out of Russia.
We support you.
Putin is a pussy.
Chat amongst yourselves now 😂.
Remember who we are.
We are LIVERPOOL and Fook the Rest!
That concludes today’s weekly news.
This is the 4KK newsroom where news breaks faster than a Manager legging it from the Chavs.
If news doesn’t break then my chief Ireland and UK chief correspondent Conor just makes the news up.
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